Why is being happy alone important?
I came across a beautiful quote this morning that emphasized the importance of finding happiness in the mundane and ordinary aspects of life. The quote highlighted that if someone cannot find joy in these everyday moments, which make up the majority of their life, then most of their time on Earth will be spent without happiness. And that's not the goal, right? We aim to be happy for the majority of our time.
If we believe that happiness only comes from finding the right job, making more money, finding a life partner, or going on a specific trip, then our happiness will only be present during certain peaks in our lives.
Reflecting on this quote, I began to relate it to my own life. The majority of my time is spent alone. If you had asked me five years ago whether I loved spending time with myself, I would have said yes. However, lately, I've realized that I am just okay with it. Nothing major has changed in my life, but my awareness of myself has grown. I've come to realize that I was always okay, and just being okay isn't enough if you want to live a full life.
Don't get me wrong; being okay is an achievement in itself, as many people struggle to live with themselves and constantly crave company, regardless of whether that company adds any value to their lives.
Being social is natural for humans, and there's no harm in seeking company. However, craving it out of desperation to escape loneliness can do more harm than good.
Our bigger goal should be to find happiness and feel loved in our loneliness. Someone who isn't happy or in love with themselves might create either an okay scenario or a miserable one in their life. The energy you resonate with will attract similar kinds of people.
Even if you've lived alone, it doesn't necessarily mean you've lived happily. If you associate that time as temporary, always waiting for it to change when you meet someone or find your tribe, you're essentially in a state of waiting. Meeting people from a state of waiting attracts unstable and temporary connections.
But is waiting enough? Waiting with the right intent and action is what creates permanent joy in your life.
Permanent joy is the energy you need to associate with your loneliness.
To create permanent joy, consider your loneliness as permanent (I'm not asking you to manifest it). Even if it turns out to be your destiny, think about how you can make it joyful in your most mundane and ordinary life.
Here's a small activity to try:
What makes you genuinely happy and feel love within yourself in your life?
How can you find happiness in the most mundane and ordinary aspects of life?
List down whatever comes to your mind for each category. At the end of this activity, you'll realize that happiness, joy, and love are always about you.
This is not a one-time practice; from time to time, you have to keep revisiting the activity. Some new things would get added, and some old ones would get removed. But every day, you would be one step closer to what you want.